The Dan Brown Code

I finished reading the Da Vinci Code today. As several people had warned me, I was disappointed by the ending. But before I say anything else about the ending, let me pick at the rest of the book.

I've found that the most important thing a writer can do is to make the characters real enough that the reader can identify with them. It doesn't matter if your character is a Hobbit in Middle Earth, a Klingon on a Vor'Cha Attack Cruiser, or a Harvard University professor visiting Paris as long as the character acts in a believable way. I expect Hobbits to be country bumpkins. I expect Klingon warriors to be aggressive. And I expect university professors to have the mental prowess of a human being. The character Robert Langdon possesses a library's wealth of information all stored inside his tiny mammalian brain. Breaking codes, identifying obscure links between unrelated things, art history, he knows it all inside and out. And if he doesn't know the answer then he can consult two other people who do. Sophie Neveau and Sir Teabing are also entirely super-intelligent. I'm not saying that I have a problem with smart characters, but when three people can unravel all the mysteries of the world's most secret organization in one day with only the knowledge they have when you meet them, then something is wrong. The only time they pause to actually research something they begin sweating because their library computer search takes more than five minutes. I can't suspend disbelief with these three, especially when you find out who the real "bad guy" is.

My other problem with the characters is that they're flat. Robert Langdon and Sophie Neveau don't have a personality. They are computers that store information and are able to retrieve it on demand. The only one with any personality is Teabing. he is unique and eccentric and I enjoyed it when he was involved in a scene. But I didn't feel anything for the other two. I couldn't get behind them. I couldn't relate to them. They were a function to tell the story, but they didn't bring me into it.

I had a hard time with the plot line. The story itself of these two people trying to evade the police as they went about their wild goose chase didn't interest me. The part of it that kept me reading was the back story. The book is littered with conspiracy theories, history, and accusations against the Church. I thought Dan Brown had some balls to put a lot of these things in his book and I was behind him 100%. Whether the story of the Knights Templar, the Holy Grail, and the Queen in Exile is true or not doesn't matter. It was interesting, it was speculative, and it kept me reading. It was great.

The entire story as you're reading seems to be showing you a secret war between the Church, with the group Opus Dei as its arm, and a secret organization known as the Priory of Sion, which is dedicated to preserving Truths that the Church is trying to cover up or destroy. I loved this. This is what I meant when I said I thought Dan Brown had balls. But here's the disappointment. At the end you find out that the Church had almost nothing to do with any of the events happening in the book in the present. Sure, there was a desperate bishop and a crazy monk, but the Church as an organization was NOT involved. It was all the scheming of ONE GUY. An independent who was affiliated with no one but himself. He wasn't with the Priory of Sion. He wasn't with the Church. He was a guy who wanted to find the Grail. Just a guy.

Who cut your balls off at the 90% complete mark, Dan Brown?

This book had the potential to be epic. A battle of ideologies in the present time in which the most powerful religion in the world could have been turned upside down. But, no. Instead we got a watered down resolution in which nothing changed. And that includes the characters. They are the same at the end of the book as they are at the beginning. Sure, they have a little more knowledge and one of them was reunited with her family, but they didn't grow as people. I cannot see any difference between the Robert Langdon I met on page one and the one I know at the end. It's like a Tom Clancy book. Sure, it's cool that there's a lot of interesting information in there, but the character is only an excuse to give you that information. The character himself is unoriginal, uninspired, and boring. So you just uncovered one of the great mysteries of the past two thousand years? That's great! Where will your NEXT adventure take you, Dr. Langdon?

Maybe it's me and I just don't understand the Mystery and/or Suspense genre. As I said, I really enjoyed the back story of this book and the character of Leigh Teabing as you first meet him, but I have a hard time thinking of anything else that stood out to me.

Spring Cleaning

Well its once again that most lovely time of the year which we call Spring. So what does this mean? Spring cleaning of course! We're cleaning out the apartment today, partially important because Lisa G. is supposed to arrive sometime tomorrow for a week long visit! Also its finally warm enough (inside as well as out) that we can put away our heated rug and kotatsu blanket. Without those I'm not sure we would have made it through the winter. Ahh Kotatsu how I love you!

The Japanese school year is also almost over. The last day is Wednesday. The students get about two weeks off before they start the next grade in April. Very different from US schools. Also they run on a trimester schedule instead of semesters.

The trees around Kagoshima are beginning to blossom. Not sure if they are sakura (cherry) or ume (plum) trees though. The sakura are the ones that Japan is really famous for. We're thinking of hosting a picnic party at a park in Matsumoto to "view" the blossoms sometime in the next couple weeks when they are at their peak bloom. Sakura viewing parties are supposedly very popular here. We'll probably post pictures of some of the trees soon so make sure to check our photos.

Back to the cleaning.

The House of God

Everyone knows what a religious person I am so it will come as no surprise when I tell you that today I went to the House of God. Actually, it's more like a hut these days. It was a beautiful day today, which lifted our spirits as we made our pilgrimage. The sun was shining, and the only cloud in the sky was over Mount Doom (Sakurajima). It was also around 65 degrees, which was nice. Once I got to the Hut of the Holy, it took a few minutes for me to get the priest to understand that I wanted to take communion because he didn't speak any English. Eventually my needs were understood and I handed him about 2,000 yen. I took my seat at the pew, and waited. Twenty minutes later he kindly brought my pizza.

You see, this was a religious experience. I hadn't eaten a pepperoni pizza in seven months. When I took a bite of that American style pizza and drank my coca-cola, my eyes were opened and the secrets of the universe were laid bare before me. With this new wisdom I came upon the single universal Truth that unites all of humankind and is the foundation stone of reality as we know it. The potential of this knowledge is staggering, and I share it with you now. Brace yourself for the ultimate Truth.

I like pizza.

Ponder that for a few minutes. I know you're as shocked and surprised as I was that our universe operates on so complex an idea, but once you consider it you'll see that everything makes sense now. I hope you appreciate your new found knowledge into the workings of the cosmos.

Now, moving on from Truth with a capital T we move to the other great news of the day: Robin and I got haircuts. Don't scoff. There's nothing scarier than being in a foreign country where they don't speak the language and needing a haircut. Fortunately, it worked out great and Robin and I are "teh hottness" as the kids say.

Interesting information time. Last month I found out that every year, at least here in Kyushu, something very strange happens. One day in Winter, the wind blows stronger than it has all year, and the temperature goes from the 40's to the 60's. It signals for the Japanese that "Spring has come." Sure enough, since then my heater has been on only minimally each day and we're seeing regular temperatures in the high 50's and mid 60's.

That's all for today. Be sure to check out the new photos by clicking the link in the sidebar on the right.

And until next time, eat a pizza for me